Just a little humor
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From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
A paraprosdokian (/pærəprɒsˈdoʊkiən/), or par'hyponoian, is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence, phrase, or larger discourse is surprising or unexpected
in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists,[1] such as Groucho Marx.
"If all the girls attending the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised." —Dorothy Parker[14][15]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraprosdokian
[snicker] Oh Dotty !
A paraprosdokian (/pærəprɒsˈdoʊkiən/), or par'hyponoian, is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence, phrase, or larger discourse is surprising or unexpected
in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists,[1] such as Groucho Marx.
"If all the girls attending the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised." —Dorothy Parker[14][15]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraprosdokian
[snicker] Oh Dotty !
Not to be confused with Dorothee Parker.
Dorothy Parker (née Rothschild; August 22, 1893 – June 7, 1967) was an American poet, literary critic and writer of fiction. Based in New York, she was known for her caustic wisecracks, and eye for 20th-century urban foibles.
Parker rose to acclaim, both for her literary works published in magazines, such as The New Yorker, and for her role as a founding member of the Algonquin Round Table. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorothy_Parker
Shiftless2
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Satire but not too far from the truth
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Medicine is a liberal hoax #maga #trump #rfkjr #foxnews #medicine | Rob Rash | Facebook
Medicine is a liberal hoax #maga #trump #rfkjr #foxnews #medicine
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Shiftless2
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Joking aside, Trump would love the sympathy vote he'd get if something happened.
Shiftless2
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Now here's an idea
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There’s something satisfying about a shirt that can deliver an entire comeback while you’re standing there completely silent. 😂 | Crafting Mania | Facebook
There’s something satisfying about a shirt that can deliver an entire comeback while you’re standing there completely silent. 😂
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Due to the complexities of mail, my package delivery is being delayed until Tuesday.
BUT !
The Trump administration is concerned enough about the mental perscrewity of our senior citizens they tack on a little PSA on the end of the USPS advisory.
They're right.
I should read more. Moby Dick? How did they know I don't ?!
Very sneaky Mr. President.
BUT !
The Trump administration is concerned enough about the mental perscrewity of our senior citizens they tack on a little PSA on the end of the USPS advisory.
They're right.
I should read more. Moby Dick? How did they know I don't ?!
Very sneaky Mr. President.
Shiftless2
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Karma is a bitch ain't it
Shiftless2
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Discussing the school trip, this Dad rules:
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Dad: Son, since there’s going to be a lot of beautiful girls on the trip you’re going on, I bought something for you.
Le Me: Don’t worry, I know how to take care of myself.
Dad: So, did you buy the anti-depressants then?
Le Me: What?!?
Dad: You’re not expecting to get any action are you?
Then he dropped me off at the nearest burn unit.
=================================
Only question was whether or not he supplied ice for that burn
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Dad: Son, since there’s going to be a lot of beautiful girls on the trip you’re going on, I bought something for you.
Le Me: Don’t worry, I know how to take care of myself.
Dad: So, did you buy the anti-depressants then?
Le Me: What?!?
Dad: You’re not expecting to get any action are you?
Then he dropped me off at the nearest burn unit.
=================================
Only question was whether or not he supplied ice for that burn
Shiftless2
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Q: Did you hear about the chickpea farmer who died at dinner?
A: The coroner is calling it a hummus-ide.
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When I die I want to be cremated. After all, it's my last chance for a smoking hot body.
A: The coroner is calling it a hummus-ide.
=============================
When I die I want to be cremated. After all, it's my last chance for a smoking hot body.
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Shiftless2
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This would be funny if he wasn't serious
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BTW, he says that women aren't supposed to look for a husband at church - if she's truly devout where else is she going to find someone who's also that much of a believer?
In like manner, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefastness and sobriety; not with braided hair, and gold or pearls or costly clothing 1 Tim 2:9 #daughters #AmericanCulture #womensfashion #AmericanWomen | End-Time Message Be
In like manner, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefastness and sobriety; not with braided hair, and gold or pearls or costly clothing 1 Tim 2:9 #daughters #AmericanCulture...
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BTW, he says that women aren't supposed to look for a husband at church - if she's truly devout where else is she going to find someone who's also that much of a believer?
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Shiftless2
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IRISH ALZHEIMER'S
Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life.
After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?"
Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he had to take off his hat
during Mass and figured he would leave it in the back of the church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat."
The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?"
Murphy replied, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all."
With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said, "After I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in hell, he?"
Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' I remembered where I left me hat."
Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life.
After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?"
Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn had a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he had to take off his hat
during Mass and figured he would leave it in the back of the church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat."
The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat. What changed your mind?"
Murphy replied, "Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 Commandments I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat after all."
With a tear in his eye the priest gave Murphy a big smile and said, "After I talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal' ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in hell, he?"
Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' I remembered where I left me hat."