Jordan Peterson Disgusted By Society Celebrating 2,560-Pound Minnesota Pumpkin

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TORONTO—In a critique of what he described as a “warped” perspective on weight, media personality and psychologist Jordan Peterson expressed disgust Tuesday over the enthusiastic reception given to a 2,560-pound prize-winning pumpkin from Minnesota. “There’s just no way that pumpkin is healthy, and no amount of tolerance from woke authoritarians is ever going to change that,” Peterson said of the gourd that was feted this week at the 49th-annual World Championship Pumpkin Weigh-Off, stating that no pumpkin weighing in excess of a ton should be celebrated by a proper society. “Considering the extent to which political correctness has undermined our culture, I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before I’m seeing these plus-size pumpkins on the cover of the weekly sale circular at my local supermarket. Clearly a civilization is in decline when it expects men to be attracted to any pumpkin that heavy.” At press time, a visibly aroused Jordan Peterson was seen caressing a shapely, petite squash in a grocery store’s produce aisle.
 
How do hillbillies celebrate Halloween?
Pump kin.

[Inspired by: Name 3 things that are in bread:
- flour
- yeast
- Pat Buchanan]
 
m #3,
Yet another gourd Trump is out of (in addition to the one on his shoulders)?

O #4
I think I've been in isolation too long. Not trying to be obtuse. No effort involved.
 
Yeah the searing heights of Trump and Petersen's wit don't do justiice to his big orange (and by now purple) head and bruised ego

He is indeed a skidmark on humanity, they both are
 
Oh, I get it, I think.

Trump is a genuine ding of ling.
IIRC Trump was pleased with himself for this execution, the fast food preparation for a group of white house guests, season victors of the NBA iirc. That means very tall Black men.

ClemsonHost190115.JPG
 
t #8,
Do you suppose they tied his shoe laces to the table leg?

I've seen a few ~1 ton pumpkins. They look squashed, as the one in the picture does.
I'm wondering if they could repeatedly reposition the pumpkin as it's growing, so it would be more spherical. - OR -
How big can a pumpkin grown on its own (without being repeatedly rocked around) and remain the shape of smaller pumpkins, roughly spherical?
 
Surprised that nobody has remarked on the source of the quote in the OP. It's The Onion

 
Surprised that nobody has remarked on the source of the quote in the OP. It's The Onion

a) oh
b) I did a character string search for "onion". The first hit was your #10. Meaning the character string "onion" doesn't appear in post #1 URL. (my reason for not noticing)
c) Embarrassing confession: I've heard of the onion for many years, but only have a suspicion that it's satirical fiction.
d) Thanks s2 for switching off the dark.
e) The suspension of posting privilege of applied to BR #1 expires in a few days. That's not a guarantee he'll be back, just an admin. note.
 
Yes Shiftless, The Onion is a well established satirical presence on the Internet. Results vary. At its best The Onion has done well. Worth a look now and then.
 
Now you guys have me wondering what it is BR #1 had in mind. Simple interest in pumpkins might explain it. I suspect he had more in mind than that when he posted.
 
b) I did a character string search for "onion". The first hit was your #10. Meaning the character string "onion" doesn't appear in post #1 URL. (my reason for not noticing)
Just point at the link at the start of the text in #1 - don't click on it - and then look at the bottom left of your screen. That will show you where the link will take you.

That's also a useful trick if you're presented with a link in a suspicious email.
 
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S2 #14
Thanks S2. W/ Firefox it displays a URL near the bottom of the screen.
I keep meaning to set up a separate, Linux based Internet computer that even if hacked is not connected to the rest of my home computer system.
It's the kind of thing I'd attend to after it's too late (lock the barn door after the horses are stolen).

Am I treating BR too casually? My perception is a trivial annoyance, rather than a @CV crisis. He's a bored child with too much spare time. "Idle hands are the Devil's playground."
 
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